Chest Hair and Doctor Golden.....

   Not ready to make the big announcement yet, but I went into the doctor today and a full, head to toe work up in preparation for a referral. My morning started with them running a complete (8 vials!) blood lab. Checking Cholesterol, Liver and kidney function, blood glucose, thyroid, and a whole host of other things. I should have the results from the blood tests tomorrow.
   Now before I go into any further details, I need take the time to explain a momentary laps of judgement. The other night, in the attempt to draw a laugh, I decided (since no one sees my chest except Amanda) to shave a heart into my chest hair as a gag. I do not have alcohol to blame as I am 11 days sober!!! Unfortunately, it was just me being stupid. I woke up the next morning and suddenly it dawned on me.... I HAVE A FULL PHYSICAL TOMORROW! They are going to see the heart, and I am going to have to explain it.
   The visit was almost over (i thought). They had done xrays, bloodwork, measurements, BMI...you name it. Well, I went to pee, and when I returned to the room I was greeted by 2 nurses and an EKG machine (SHIT!) I knew what was coming. "Mr Boling, we are going to do an EKG, please remove your shirt and lie on the bed." I immediately went on the defense. "OK....but before I take off my shirt, I need to explain something" (at this point, I think they were prepared for me to tell them I had a third nipple, or an alien baby growing from my abdomen, sans Total Recall). "I thought it would be cute to shave a heart into my chest hair, so when I remove my shirt, don't laugh, OK?" The nurses both acknowledge with smirks on their faces. No quicker did I have the shirt above my head, they were both laughing. "See this is what I DIDN'T want to happen. Don't be gossiping to the nurses!"
   They hooked me up to the EKG and the shaved heart proved to be useful when attaching what felt like thousands of what I call "Diodes". Im not sure that's the technical term. They finally finished, and a few minutes later, my good, familiar, and favorite doctor was in the room (Dr. Golden). I have been seeing this man since before I had pubic hair. He explained to me that the EKG uncovered what is known as a "Bundle Branch Block" (sounds like a decent band name). If you are interested in reading more about this disorder (for lack of better word) you can learn about it by clicking here.
   I was also put on blood pressure meds, and given a referral to a (currently) undisclosed Dr. Golden took a full physical (turn your head and cough please), and really put me through the ringer. I will post my blood test results tomorrow. 


I will make a big announcement when/if things work out like I'm planning. I dont want to get ahead of myself.