Now Open for business....

Hey BFL Fans,
Before I get into today's post, I just want to take a moment again to say thanks! This blog has really turned into to something that I had only hoped for. I am getting great feedback from my readers! Don't forget to follow the blog to get notified by email when I make new posts!

   Moving on.... I decided last night to just not take my klonopin. I have been taking 1mg per day, and I thought it would be safe to go ahead drop it cold turkey. At about 11PM last night, my neck started itching, and it continually got worse. I woke up this morning with hives! I googled it, and of course, hives is a side effect of klonopin withdrawal. Turns out, I need to step down .25 mg at a time over the next couple weeks. I should of read up before I quit all willy nilly.
   I finally heard back from the unemployment office today and my very VERY meager unemployment benefits have finally been approved. I was happy to hear that considering I couldn't even get even so much as a return call from the Jonesboro Workforce. I should have a direct deposit by tomorrow!
   I went to Lowes today, and I picked up a new mailbox. I got one of the cool plastic ones with a front and back door. So, now I wont have to risk my life to check the mail. I really lucked out on the installation, because it turns out, it only needed about 2 feet of post. So, I got to saw off most of the broken post. It was a hassle to install, and started raining on me.  While I was at Lowes I decided to pick up a new palm tree since a dog chewed up our last one. It is just a stump is a nice planter inside our house, and it was very ugly. So Ill try to plant our new palm tomorrow. Here is the final product of my work today.

   I have decided to go ahead and move forward with doing youtube "Vlogging" or video blogging. I will still do these traditional posts, but I think that youtube videos will personalize this thing a little more. The only issue right now is that my EVO does not sync the audio right when  recording videos. I would really love to get my hands on a Flip HD. It may be something that will have to wait until next month (my birthday). At any rate, I sure hope you guys will follow me over to youtube. I think it will be a lot of fun!
   Thats all I got for today.

When I stepped on the scale, it said "TILT"....

   Ok....not really, but I halfway expected it. I must have missed the scale last time I went. It was probably because I was distracted by the garmentless geezer. However, I decided to go ahead and weigh in since I really just started the diet thing. This is what I saw.

   Its about as I figured. This is the part where Im not suppose to tell you that I just ate, or hadn't had a BM, or some other excuse. I'm just going to take it as it is. Its a horrible truth, but hey....this is why I started this blog in the first place, right?
   I guess it was the lack of junk food or the increase in fluids that gave me the second wind that made me decide (mid-halo, mind you)  to make a 10:00PM trip to the gym. Whatever the reason, I took the motivation and ran with it. I put The Kooks on and pumped myself up on the way to the gym.
   I decided to do the recumbent bike again thinking it would be the easiest on the knees and hips. This time I had the know how to actually start the machine and set a customized workout. It asked me my weight....I pressed the up button and held it.....after about 10 seconds I glanced over my shoulder to make sure no one was staring at it with this OH MY GOD look on their face. I turn back, and its at 300....I was thinking this would be so much better if it actually let me use the number pad instead of holding the "Up" button for 10 minutes. Then it asks my age, and then starts me off on like a level one resistance, which felt like I pedaling air. I hate that feeling. Its like being in first gear on a 10-speed bike. I set a base level of 6 resistance, and started feeling the burn almost immediately. The timer was set at 25:00 workout with 5:00 cool down. I had literally just had a huge glass of water before leaving the house so it felt like a wave pool in my stomach.
   The first 15 minutes went relatively quickly, then the bike beeped and said "Now increasing resistance to 8".  
Thats when time really started to creep. Thank God Conan was on, because he helped me push through it.
When it was all said and done.....I had gone over 7 miles! I was very proud. The workout summary said I had an average heart rate of 146 with a high of 160. I still haven't checked to see whats good. So hopefully I wasn't borderline heart attack.

   This time, I tried to play it cool as I got off the bike, because last time I almost face planted. I pretended to be looking at my phone as if to read an email or text while I waited for the "Jello Legs" to calm down a bit. That, and my ass was numb. I slowly jive walked to the locker room, making sure to do the obligatory James Bond peek around the corner.
   I came home, and I feel pretty good right now. It was almost like taking an upper. It gave me a little burst of happy. I can see why people who make a habit of exercising really enjoy it. I'm sure I'm going to be sore tomorrow, but I feel like this was a leap in the right direction.

   I just need to keep it going, keep it going, keep it going full steam...to sweet to be sour, to nice to be mean! (Sorry, I couldn't resist....its the Beastie Boys)
 

A good start...

   Well, the day is about half over, and I'm still alive. I had an early morning appt today, and it was so tempting to stop by Hardees and get a monster biscuit and hash browns which would have accounted for 1380 calories and 94 grams of fat. Instead, I went to Subway and got the Western Flatbread (egg white). And saved myself 1000 calories, and 85 grams of fat! That doesn't even include the large Mellow Yellow I would have bought at Hardees. Which reminds me....The caffeine withdrawals have begun. My head is killing me, and I feel sluggish. Hopefully that will pass in the next day or so.
   We desperately need groceries, but I don't get paid until Thursday so I'll have to get creative to eat healthy at home. Its hard when there are still frozen burritos, and pizzas in the freezer. Its so tempting! I think there are still some chicken breasts and tilapia buried under the junk food somewhere. I'll have a look in a little while. So far today, I'm up to 7 cups of water, but I plan to double that before bedtime. I'm working on 24 oz of Green tea right now. I'm in major flush mode for the next couple of days.
   I slept well last night, and I did it without the use of medicines. I did take an anti histamine and decongestant last night, but they were supposedly non-drowsy. I don't want to get to the point that I have to depend on drugs to sleep well. I have had no Klonopins so far today, but Ill need to take at least 1mg at some point to avoid withdrawals. This is down from 2 mg. My back is feeling somewhat better, so I have managed to deal with the pain without use of pain relievers or muscle relaxers. However, if this headache continues to worsen, ill be taking some migraine medicine that has just a pinch of caffeine in it.
   You really don't realize the amount of crap you put into your body until you start thinking about it every time before you consume something. If I would have been keeping a food diary before this whole blog deal, my dad probably would have literally kicked my ass if he saw it. Its embarrassing.
   I got to admit, it felt kind of nice getting up early this morning, I think I feel better having gotten up than I would have if I had slept in until 11 as usual. I need to try to make it a point to be out of bed by 9 or 10 at the latest. This is considering that I keep my late hours as I have been doing since the lay off. I have always been somewhat of a night owl, and I prefer the sleeping hours of 2AM-11AM. I'm not exactly sure if thats unhealthy or not. I guess as long as its a regular sleeping pattern and I am getting my 8 hours, it should suffice, right?
   I've rambled on enough for now. I have been doing school work all day and I'm thinking I may have some leisure time now. Don't forget to check out my food diary! I have an app for my android, so I am putting EVERYTHING in my diary that I consume. Hopefully by tomorrow I will be able to log in some exercises with my food diary. I just don't want to re-injure myself.

Clean as a whistle.....eventually

 So, everyone has their vices. I think we can all agree to that. As some of you know, and some may not, one of my vices is putting bad things into my body. Now, Im not talking about hard drugs....Im talking about, first and foremost, liquor. To add to that, Energy Drinks, fast foods, candy, refined foods...etc.
  Starting here and now, I am making a promise to myself, my family, and my readers, that none of these things will enter my body again. I know you are wondering how do you know I will be honest about it....well, I have turned over administrative rights to the blog, to my wife. Meaning, that she can post, and edit posts. If she catches me cheating, she will post it on my blog for the whole world to see, in a most embarrassing way.
   I cannot even begin to hope to get healthy without first detoxing my body. This means there will be alot of green tea, and water in my future over the next week. Lots of fiber as well. I will be posting a link to a personal food diary that all my readers will have access to. I will include in this diary EVERYTHING that I consume, down to the last ounce of water.
   The first step is, of course, liquor, and foods. Then eventually, I will wean off of Klonopin. Klonopin is a benzodiazapine and cannot be stopped cold turkey as it can lead to seizures. The only chemical that I will put into my body will be Paxil, which is my anti-depressant. Klonopin will be taken on an AS NEEDED basis only. Meaning times of extreme anxiety.
Here are the items that I will immediately eliminate from my diet.

• Alcohol
• Caffeine
• Chocolate
• Juices (unless they are fresh)
• Soft Drinks
• Processed Meats
• Excess Salt
• Shellfish
• Beef
• Fast Foods

   I cannot hope to get healthier unless I first detox. Since I am still not in the position to exercise due to my back (although i should be back in the gym within a couple of days), this is something I can do to get the ball rolling until I can hit the gym again. 

   Now, as Amanda will likely be happy to tell you, this isnt the first time I have said no more energy drinks and alcohol, and I have eaten those words numerous times. However, this blog gives me a kind of exposure. Its not just me saying I'm going to quit, its putting it into action and getting the readers behind me. Also, the fear of embarrassment if I get caught with my hand in the cookie jar. Amanda has promised to keep a hawk's eye on me to make sure I don't cheat. 

  This will also take a bit of a commitment from my friends and family with whom I regularly drink, or go out to eat with. No more invitations to eat out, or to have a few beers. Ill come back in a little while and post a link to my food and exercise diary. 


****UPDATE**** I have added a linky to my Food Diary in the top right corner under the BFL Banner. I will start updating it immediately

Ill never miss another dose!

   Well, yesterday was horrible. I barely found the will to breathe. After some thinking and research, I think all my symptoms were due to my missing a dose of Paxil. I did end up taking 1 klonopin yesterday, and last night I slept like a rock. Of course I was up first thing this morning with Gracie, so Im still a little tired, but I'll get a nap in when Amanda gets up. Ill just have to NOT forget my paxil again.
   Im thinking at my current rate, I will back at the gym by mid week. My back is still a little sore, but not nearly as bad. I was trying to think of some exercises that would be low impact on my hips. You would think that the recumbent bike would be ideal, but apparently not! My gym doesn't have a swimming pool, so thats out.
 I still have not received a decision on my unemployment benefits. I don't understand what the problem is! They say there is a hang up due to my severance pay, but that makes no sense. I haven't even started receiving severance yet, and when I call the local office to tell them that, they just sit there like a dumbass and dont give me an answer. I guess I'll have to go up there tomorrow.
Today is just going to be a day for rest and recovery. Im feeling like myself today, and I just want to enjoy a restful day.

Sick of being sick.....

I had a horrible night last night. I ended up in bed at about 2AM. I completely drenched the sheets in sweat. I had night sweats all night long, I tossed and turned, and kept getting twitches in my legs. I can only assume that its all the prescriptions Im on right now. I was already on Paxil and Klonopin (for depression and anxiety), then the doc prescribed me Tylox, Flexeril, and some type of Steroid for my back. My back is still hurting, but I am going to try not to take ANYTHING today except the Paxil. Im not sure if I've been on Klonopin long enough to experience withdrawal, but I've heard that it causes terrible withdrawal. I think if i experience any symptoms I'll just take .5 mg  to see if it helps the withdrawal symptoms. Im really tired of being in a cloud all the time because of meds. Sometimes I look at how I feel now Vs how i felt when I went to the doc for the anxiety and depression. I honestly don't remember being this miserable before. The anxiety is what kills me. It turns me into a crazy person. If I have an ailment such as the leg twitching from last night, or the night sweating, I google it. Then before you know it I'm convinced that I have MS or ALS or some horrible disease. I know it probably sounds goofy to someone who doesn't suffer from anxiety, but its a real problem for me. Any time I have an issue or something odd with my body, i google it. No matter how hard I try to resist, I cant.
   At any rate...Im going to try to NOT take anything but Paxil today and see what happens. Ill report back here with any news. I hope all goes well....

Not every day can be interesting....

Well, in keeping with my promise, I am trying to update my blog at least on a daily basis. Of course, I never said I could be interesting in every post. I have Xander with me until Sunday, so once I got up this morning, I made Xander help me load up some old cardboard boxes to take to the landfill. We decided to return a couple of items to Big Lots, then decided to get a bite to eat. We didn't realize until it was too late that the landfill closes at 4PM. I stopped by Lowes to look at some replacement mailboxes, but they were very expensive. Im not going to buy a new mailbox for a rental home. Ill leave that up to my landlord.
   My back is still hurting me. I guess I'm going to go ahead and suck it up and go to the chiro Tuesday. I have got to get back into the gym. Its like im wasting money and time by not going to the gym. I will get back in there by next week, I promise!
   As bad as I hated to do it, I went ahead and added a donation button for funds to go towards lap band surgery. I normally hate asking for handouts, but since I am currently unemployed, I don't have a choice. Of course no one is obligated.
 Speaking of unemployment, mine still has not been approved because of the severance pay, so Im tripping out over money right now, but who isnt? If any of my readers know of any part time jobs, please let me know. I just need something working about 10-15 hours a week. Something to just kind of supplement my income.
As stated before, I dont really have anything interesting to talk about today, but I wanted to do my daily update.

I do want to say that I am very happy with the amount of traffic and support I have received on this blog. Its still in its infancy, but if recent activity is any indicator, we could be in for a long and interesting ride. Stay tuned!