Blast from the past.

Today was a good day, overall....I helped Brittney get the chair in her apt. Here's the weird thing. I talked on the phone with my old step dad. The very same douchebag that use to beat everyone in my family. Im not really in a state to go into the gruesome details of what he was like, but things are a little different. He was diagnosed shortly after the divorce with having bipolar disorder. So, the meds that he is on make him a likable person. Before the phone conversation was over, it actually ended with plans to meet up with him for lunch when he is in town this summer. I feel like it could be a step in the right direction for me to kind of get closure on some of the things he use to do to me. I feel the need to include the fact that there was no sexual abuse or anything of that nature. It was just a lot of yelling and hitting.
While I was at Brittneys, I had a couple of drinks....by the time I got home it was time to go to Amanda's mom's house. We had a great meal, and the next thing I know, It was 11:00 and time to leave. I fell asleep on the recliner and have no recollection of what happened while I was over there. It is a horrible feeling to have things going on around you and have no clue what happened because you were sleeping. I know that it is one of the side effects of Klonopin, but I feel horrible about it.
Tomorrow marks the first day of my "diet", which will include absolutely no alcohol. I have got to stay away from the stuff while im on my AD's and Benzos. Im also going to stay away from the energy drinks. Im going to need a lot of support to quit the sauces, but I know that it needs to be done. Its one of the worst things I do to my body. Its so easy to want that jolt that Energy drinks and/or alcohol gives you when you are suffering through depression. I really think that the Paxil is going help me feel better. I am just going to replace those negative things in my life with more positive things like exercise, and helping people out. I just know that I have got to stay busy.
I have felt myself being nostalgic alot over the past week or so. Im not sure why I have the sudden need to look back and try to analyze my past. Is it healthy? Or should I just leave it alone....